Not posting as much as I used to, mostly because I don't have as much time as I used to, and trying to avoid most of the drama that used to happen when I posted. Been kinda busy lately with work and stuff. Changed my schedule, working late hours now, which is good for the paycheck but it means working with the idiot supervisor that likes to treat me like a child. Though I've learned to deal with it better. I just smile at him and then tell my supervisor what he's been doing and it usually gets him in trouble with upper management, because he's doing dumb stuff he knows he not suppose to do.

Other than work, life has been interesting. Back in April we moved to Council Bluffs, immediately after the house got broken into again. Lost quite a bit of stuff, still haven't replaced most of it. Eventually I'll be able to replace what needs replacing. What irritated me most is the stuff that can't be replaced. My grand mother's necklace, the pictures of my children that were on the computer...that sort of stuff.

In June I had my tonsil removed finally. Spent a week living on freezer pops and bottled water. Couldn't talk, and could barely swallow. Though I'm glad they did it now that the weather is getting colder. I can still talk unlike most years this time, which is very good.

July was quiet, did the 4th thing. hung out with friends and stuff. August was pretty bad. Mid way though the month I popped a cyst in my kidneys and couldn't move for several days. Went to see my doctor, ended up seeing his PA instead. She (the PA) had no clue what she was doing, and tried to tell me there was no way the pain I was feeling could be in my kidney because my kidneys are "tucked up and protected by the rib cage, so you pain is too low for it be the kidney" waited 24 hours, started bleeding went to see a different doctor, got good pain meds. two days later I was admitted to the hospitol. Spent 10 days in there, recieved several blood transfusions, and spent lots of time listening to the doctors there argue about what to do. not one of them could agree on anything. They finally discharged me, and I started feeling better once I got home though it took til several weeeks into September for me to feel totally better and I'm still not back to where I was when it started.

Mostly though life is good. Johnathan and I are doing well, and he is supportive and understanding. everyone here is getting ready for Halloween and stuff. Johnathan is looking for a job, things got really bad at his job, and the company started having issues with payroll includinf several bounced paychecks. thankfully not one of his, but definetly time to get out while the getting is good.

I'll try to be better about updating in the future, though I can't make any promises.

So this weekend I went to Idaho to visit my mom for the the first time in 10 years and got to see my brothers for the frist time in 15 years. In the process I met my neices and nephews for the first time. It was an amazing weekend and ( here are the pics. )

Should I add ( this picture ) to my Wiki for Constance, who now goes by Angelina, that was taken in Chicago and professionally edited because someone honestly things of her as an angel?

seriously...I love the pic, it's really interesting...and they did a good job, even if my hair went flat becuase of the rain and the hat I wear for her.


EDIT: Ok I added the pic...:) thanks for the input.

Plane landed about 20 minutes ago...

my heart is racing...

must breath and relax...

tea sounds really really good about now...

so yeah...this is mean trying to relax

SO here are some pictures of my boys. so you all can see the two most important men in my life.... ( here are my babies... )

So Yeah...I finally proved it beyond a shadow of a doubt...

I am a total fuck up...and there is no use in trying to fix it or anything I do...

that is all for now...

And I'm on a plane headed for Las Vegas, NV for the weekend. I so seriously can not wait to get there...it's gonna rawk big time. Here's to Vegas, here's to fun, and here's to some real life stuff going really really well...:)

*runs off to go pack*

come fly away with me and not get burned! DJ Fyrefly on the Eclectic Soul Station! tune in at http://www.live365.com/stations/theeclecticsoul and join us in #TES with your requests!"http://www.live365.com/stations/theeclecticsoul
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for requests

YIM: dj_fyrefly
Windows Messenger: fyreflygoddess
IRC: DJ_Fyrefly

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night

Not much going on right now, had a pretty rough weekend last week, looks like things are getting better thought, which is good. Been working a ton, which is good...helps me keep from being so depressed this time of year, when I'm missing my kids and my family.

Will be broadcasting on monday, mostly because there really isn't anything going on around here, my kids are in Milwaukee, and the rest of my family is in Idaho. *shrugs* It'll be fun to make sure those who tune in have good music for the holiday.

as I said earlier, there's not much going on right now...which is a good thing...:)

The first five people to respond to this post, will get some form of art, by me, about [or tailored to] them. I make no guarantees about quality or type, but I will assure that I will give it good effort and that the art will be individual to you, so if you get a mixed CD or some sort of painting doodle, yours is the only one like it.
The only catch, of course; as with most memes, if you sign up, you have to put this in your own journal as well.

Who said, "sometimes you need to just sit back, relax, and let the world happen around you."

I've decided this in one of those times...

sit back, let the storm rage itself out, then effect the clean up when it's finished.



Thanks for the advise...

Posted, uncut and unlocked...
==========================================================================================

A lot has been said about how to prevent rape.
Women should learn self-defense.
Women should lock themselves in their houses after dark.
Women shouldn't have long hair and women shouldn't wear short skirts.
Women shouldn't leave drinks unattended. Fuck, they shouldn't dare to get drunk at
all.

Instead of that bullshit, how about:

If a woman is drunk, don't rape her.
If a woman is walking alone at night, don't rape her.
If a women is drugged and unconscious, don't rape her.
If a woman is wearing a short skirt, don't rape her.
If a woman is jogging in a park at 5 a.m., don't rape her.
If a woman looks like your ex-girlfriend you're still hung up on, don't rape her.
If a woman is asleep in her bed, don't rape her.
If a woman is asleep in your bed, don't rape her.
If a woman is doing her laundry, don't rape her.
If a woman is in a coma, don't rape her.
If a woman changes her mind in the middle of or about a particular activity, don't rape her.
If a woman has repeatedly refused a certain activity, don't rape her.
If a woman is not yet a woman, but a child, don't rape her.
If your girlfriend or wife is not in the mood, don't rape her.
If your step-daughter is watching TV, don't rape her.
If you break into a house and find a woman there, don't rape her.
If your friend thinks it's okay to rape someone, tell him it's not, and that he's not your friend.
If your "friend" tells you he raped someone, report him to the police.
If your frat-brother or another guy at the party tells you there's an unconscious woman upstairs and it's your turn, don't rape her, call the police and report him as a rapist.
Tell your sons, god-sons, nephews, grandsons, and sons of friends that it's not okay to rape someone.


Don't just tell your women friends how to be safe and avoid rape.
Don't imply that she could have avoided it if she'd only done/not done x,y or z.
Don't imply that it's in any way her fault.
Don't let silence imply agreement when someone tells you he "got some" with the drunk girl.
Don't perpetuate a culture that tells you that you have no control over or responsibility for your actions. You can, too, help yourself.

If you agree, repost it. It's that important.

The Rock Project Featuring Tina Arena, "Never"

(Verse 1)
I can't be with you again
Don't remind me of the good times that we had
I learned a lot from us since then
And I never want these feelings to ever come again

(Chorus)
You'll never hear me crying
You'll never see me trying
To love you once again
Your love is so past tense

(Verse 2)
Please don't tell me that you've changed
(and I) don't want to hear on how, you've lost your evil ways
(you see) the one who's changed this time is me
And I won't go back to feeling helpless and deceived

(Chorus)2X
You'll never hear me crying
You'll never see my trying
To love you once again
Your love is so past tense

(YOUR LOVE)
(YOUR LOVE)

(Bridge)
To think you had me fooled every now and then
You had me believing that I was the reason that you left
But I won't fall back in love with you again
I don't even want to be, - I don't want to be -
(backgrounds) your friend, no NO NO

(Chorus - )2X
You'll never hear me crying
You'll never see me trying
To love you once again
Your love is so past tense



No I don't want to be your friend anymore, you screwed up, you hurt me more than one, and when you finally crossed the line I realized just how little you honestly cared for me


AND
Keith Urban, "You'll think of Me"


I woke up early this morning around 4am
With the moon shining bright as headlights on the interstate
I pulled the covers over my head and tried to catch some sleep
But thoughts of us kept keeping me awake
Ever since you found yourself in someone else's arms
I've been tryin' my best to get along
But that's OK
There's nothing left to say, but

Take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
Take your space and take your reasons
But you'll think of me
And take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot BETTER
But you'll think of me, you'll think of me

I went out driving trying to clear my head
I tried to sweep out all the ruins that my emotions left
I guess I'm feeling just a little tired of this
And all the baggage that seems to still exist
It seems the only blessing I have left to my name
Is not knowing what we could have been
What we should have been
So

Take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
Take your space and take your reasons
But you'll think of me
And take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me

Someday I'm gonna run across your mind
Don't worry, I'll be fine
I'm gonna be alright
While you're sleeping with your pride
Wishing I could hold you tight
I'll be over you
And on with my life

So take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
And take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we have nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me

So take your records, take your freedom
Take your memories I don't need 'em
Take your space and all your reasons
But you'll think of me
And take your cat and leave my sweater
'Cause we got nothing left to weather
In fact I'll feel a whole lot better
But you'll think of me, you'll think of me, yeah

And you're gonna think of me
Oh someday baby, someday


Yes you will think of me, and by the time you realize exactly what you did wrong it'll be far to late to repair the damage, because it's already to late to try. Just remember one day you'll realize just what you missed out on and I'll be long over you.